Burn Bright
by Stephane Richer
Summary: And you made me who I am


Burn Bright

Disclaimer: I don't own My Chemical Romance's "Burn Bright" or Tite Kubo's _Bleach_.

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The lightning flashes, illuminating the room as Isshin enters. He's been way too late at the clinic, but he doesn't know what else to do. Come home? He's next door, and if the kids feel like they need him they can always come. Ichigo definitely made sure to take the girls home with him from elementary school, and the neighbors brought over so much food, and there will definitely have been some left that they could heat up in the oven. But still, the house is messy and hollow, has spiraled downward faster than he thought Masaki could have lost her powers.

But for a second, as the lightning lights it up he wonders if he's in the wrong house, even though it's literally feet away from the clinic. It's spotless, almost sparkling, and it smells like beef—they've had some in the freezer, but none of the neighbors brought any over. On the table is a plate covered in plastic wrap with a note in Ichigo's messy scrawl that says, "Yuzu made this. It's really good."

It looks delicious, too. It's just a simple beef stew over rice, but somehow Yuzu knew which spices to put in, and it's the perfect balance of broth, meat, and vegetables. The rice is also perfectly cooked and fluffy, not burnt or underdone. When could his five-year-old daughter have learned how to do this?

He quietly finishes eating, cleans his plate, and tiptoes upstairs. He opens the door to Karin and Yuzu's room to check on them, and all three kids are squeezed into Yuzu's bed together, sound asleep. They're still wearing their school clothes, and he can see the tear tracks on Ichigo's and Yuzu's faces. Karin is facedown.

He's about to leave when she stirs, turning face up. Thunder rumbles again, and she jumps a little. How they've all been sleeping through a storm like this he'll never know.

"Dad?" Karin whispers.

"I just came to check on you…" he grins. "How is Karin-chan?"

She glares. "You're useless. Yuzu had to make dinner all by herself."

"But Karin-chan, Daddy has to make a living," he fake-pouts.

"Whatever. Be quiet, you'll wake them," she hisses.

Ichigo and Yuzu are still fast asleep. Karin is the closest to the edge of the bed, and if she inches in a little more…

"Move in, Daddy will join you!"

Karin scowls but complies. The mattress is still a bit small lengthwise and Isshin's ankles and feet hang off the end, but there are worse situations. He's too tired to worry about comfort, anyway, and drifts off as thunder continues to sound, getting more and more distant. Karin settles back into sleep next to him, breathing steadily. He hopes in her dreams she can let out her tears, but also understands why she won't cry.

He dreams first that he's back in Seireitei with Kyoraku; they're shirking together. Kyoraku knows somehow that this is Isshin's dream, and tells him such. He then ambles away and Isshin cannot follow; he is brought to his knees. Matsumoto has caught up with him and demands that he go to the captain's meeting, but before he can say "yes" or "no" her eyes glow and she turns into that white hollow.

The hollow explodes and he is sent flying backwards, and he's sent all the way into an unfamiliar place. But Masaki is there, smiling and holding out her hand. He runs to grab it, afraid that she might disappear or dissolve any second.

She doesn't.

"I'm sorry I let that hollow take you; I'm sorry; I didn't realize…"

She only smiles. It seems she can't speak. Tears fill his eyes; she wipes them away, and as she's wiping his eyes she does dissolve, and so does everything around him.

He's back at the main Shiba estate, and he hears a wailing child. Oddly, he now remembers that it isn't real. Perhaps he's reliving a memory, then? It could be his younger self, or any one of his cousins, nieces, or nephews. The sound grows nearer; the child is running toward him.

It's Ganju, who runs up to him and grabs his leg, something he used to do all the time when he was small enough.

"Uncle, Uncle!" he sobs. "Is it really true?"

Is what really true? This is no memory, but the way his nephew phrases it makes Isshin wary. What is "it"? Is it some kind of story Kuukaku or Kaien told him? He looks up at Isshin again, and his face morphs into Karin's, and the tears harden and turn to ice, shattering on the ground.

"You're an idiot, Dad!" she shrieks. "You can't protect us at all!" and she punches him in the face.

And again he is propelled backward, but this time he opens his eyes to what he at least believes to be reality. Ichigo's hand is inches away from his face; he must have stretched it out while they were asleep. Karin is clutching at him, her face buried in his chest. All three children are still asleep. With some difficulty, he extracts himself from Karin's iron grip, but she does not wake.

He leaves the room, shutting the door quietly behind him. The hallway, which that morning was covered in dust and strewn-about clothes, is now spotless. Somehow, his children, at their young ages, had cleaned the entire house and made dinner; somehow they were figuring this out for themselves. They are beginning the inevitability of carrying on without Masaki, and he's behind them on that. Damn.

Maybe he can cut back on the hours. After all, in an emergency he'll be right next door, and if the kids can cook dinner and clean the house then they might be able to help out in the clinic, too.

His room is unoccupied. There's no one in the bed, which has seemed so big and boundless for the past few days. He feels incomplete, empty. Somehow, she'd given him the confidence to succeed in this strange new world where he had no idea what he was doing. He'd been lost, but Masaki had gotten lost with him by finding him.

But now, he has left a mark, and even though she's not here anymore he's still tethered to this world. Ichigo (and the hollow inside of him), Karin, Yuzu, all of them depend on him still. The clinic needs him. He has a place.


End file.
